A'nesis Retreats and Counseling Sabbaticals

Come Away to a Quiet Place and Rest Awhile ~ Christian Retreats with Intensive Counseling

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“The One I Kiss…”

I’m seeing a common thread for the deepest pain now that I’m going into twelve years of counseling people who are living in all their worst places of their stories,   There is one dark night of the soul that seems to bring the most devastation to a person’s heart. Betrayal in a relationship can be such a deep cut that takes a tremendous amount of personal work to walk out of.  Sometimes the task of healing seems insurmountable.

The problem with betrayal is that it involves trust.  When we open up our hearts to trust we believe the person we’re trusting has our best interests as a priority.  When that person betrays us they move from the category of friend, lover or precious family member to traitor.  Our minds do a double-take trying to match up what we expected from the betrayer to the reality of what is.  The tension between what we thought and what is can keep our minds tangled for days, months or even years.

There are two truths that can help a person betrayed to find their way out of the abyss.  Realizing that betrayal hits all our main lies concerning our identity can be helpful.  “I don’t belong,” “I’m not lovable,” “I’m not wanted,” “I ‘m not enough” are they typical ways a betraying act can assault who we are at the core of our being.  Combating these lies about the truth of who we are can be a slow process but very effective to bring healing.

Secondly, the saving grace about betrayal is that we are not alone in it.  Jesus, the one who endured His own dark night, is the ultimate example of betrayal from someone in their inner circle.  Matthew 26 in the Message says, “The one I kiss, that’s the one—seize him. He (Judas) went straight to Jesus, greeted him, ‘How are you, Rabbi?’ and kissed him.”

Realizing a person close to us has betrayed us under the guise of friendship is a very painful experience.  Ultimately, there is solace knowing that eventually our hearts will heal and we will be the better for it.  No one goes through a dark night this impactful without drawing closer to the One who will never leave, never disappoint and always has our best interests at heart.  We arise victorious out of the ashes, learn our lessons and vow never to be a traitor ourselves, knowing firsthand the pain betrayal causes those who are kissed by it.

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Shake, Rattle and Roll

Ever feel like your mind is participating in some sort of 50’s dance floor jive?  For all of us the battle truly is in the mind.  When life throws us curve balls and challenges that are beyond our capacity to control we can have a hard time reigning in our thoughts.  One thought begets another until we are either flooded with anxiety and fear or shutdown with depression.

The only anecdote to dodging mine fields that cause our entire being to “shake, rattle, and roll” is to hang onto the truth.  When we are bombarded with anxiety and fear spinning in our heads, it is important to change directions in our thinking.  The Greek word for shake is “saleuso.”  The meaning of “saleuso” is “to put in a state of waving, rocking, vibratory motion or to be moved in mind, to agitate or disturb.”

As God’s children, we have the promise of  an “unshakable kingdom.”  Hebrews 12:28 tells us “…therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe.”

Resting under the shadow of His wings takes care of all our “shake rattle and roll” anxieties and fears. If you’re experiencing agitation and lack of peace today, grab onto a truth that rights your thoughts or helps your heart calm down.  Be thankful to God for at least one thing.  Contemplate on the Truth that we are people of an “unshakable kingdom.”  Now that’s a reason to dance a happy dance, not a shake, rattle and roll jive.